People often
comment that my wife I look alike. I always respond that, in spite of the
similarities, it’s the differences that really matter. Men and women are
different. In a world where lines of gender roles and gender identity are
becoming fuzzy, I would argue that the feminine arts of womanhood are dying,
and that is not a good thing.
Now I’m not
advocating that we need to go back to the days of June Cleaver, but I am
suggesting that womanhood should be celebrated, not subjugated; That being
feminine is a strength, not a weakness; That behaving like a woman is not
something to be a scoffed and ridiculed, but something to be admired.
I have been
fortunate to have several strong and capable women in my life. From my mother
who brought ten children into the world and raised them, to my beautiful wife
who makes a friend everywhere she goes, and various other successful women
throughout my life, I have been surrounded by countless examples of womanhood
at its finest. I have watched them nurture the sick, organize large gatherings,
and perform manly tasks in a man’s world, without losing the hallmark
characteristics of womanhood such as warmth, kindness, and compassion.
Throughout
history women have been subjugated to subservient roles or minimized by
tradition or even the legal system of a given society. Perhaps men have done
this out of fear or a sense of insecurity, but the long-reaching result is that
women, and womanhood, have been marginalized or treated as an inferior station.
Women don’t
need to be placed on pedestal to be worshipped or admired from a distance. They
don’t need to be segregated and locked away like some hidden treasure. They
need to find their place alongside someone that celebrates their differences,
honors their virtues, and values their contributions. Womanhood should be
celebrated.
Men (speaking
of the gender as a whole) are physically stronger than women, but that doesn’t
mean that women lack strength. Femininity comes with its own set of strengths.
By nature, women multitask better, nurture more, and resolve conflict in
constructive ways. Because they lack the physical strength, and oftentimes the
ego, of men, they are more likely to use their head to tackle a problem instead
of brute strength. My mother can accomplish most tasks that a twenty-something
male body builder can do. She just uses her head, leverage, and tools instead
of muscle. The best part is that women can do all this while wearing a dress
and heels. Feminine is also strong.
Behaving like
a woman should be admired, and I don’t mean the glossy-magazine type of
admiration. A woman’s touch can brighten a room or event and make it more
enjoyable. A woman’s charm can soften even the hardest of hearts. A woman’s
courage can carry her, and sometimes her entire family, through the valley of
the shadow of death. A woman’s virtue can inspire us to reach for loftier
heights. A woman’s love can transform us and encourage us to make the woman in
our life proud. Womanhood, with all its endearing behaviors, should be admired.
Women today,
in their attempt to be more like men, are losing the feminine arts of
womanhood. When women downplay their feminine features they are also minimizing
the inherent strengths that come with being a woman. The very qualities that
make a woman feminine also make her strong and talented. They overlook the
intrinsic value of their womanhood in an attempt to be like a man, and in the
end they find that they are neither a capable man, nor a desirable woman.
I’m a better man because of them.
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